daily entry, jam of the day, misc, personal, recovery

jam of the day: save myself by ed sheeran

i got nothing.
this song resonates so much with my past, the present, and things to remember in the future.

no, i’m not drinking or taking pills… but i’ve done things in the past… and, well, i almost broke down completely after i finally listened to the song all the way through.

i love ed sheeran, but i couldn’t bring myself to listen to this song.
until now.

xo

I gave all my oxygen to people that could breath
I gave away my money and now we don’t even speak
I drove miles and miles but would you do the same for me
Oh honestly?

Offered up my shoulder just for you to cry upon
Gave you constant shelter and a bed to keep you warm
They gave me the heartache and in return I gave a song
It goes on and on and on

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
I drown it with a drink and out of date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me, they just left me on the shelf, no farewell
So before I save someone else, I’ve got to save myself

I gave you all my energy and I took away your pain
Cause human beings are destined to radiate or drain
What line do we stand upon cause from here it looks the same?
And only scars remain

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
I drown it with a drink and out of date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me, they just left me on the shelf, no farewell
So before I save someone else, I’ve got to save myself

But if I don’t then I’ll go back to where I’m rescuing a stranger
Just because they needed saving, just like that
Oh I’m here again, between the devil and the danger
But I guess it’s just my nature
My dad was wrong, cause I’m not like my mum
Cause she’d just smile and I’m complaining in a song, but it helps
So before I save someone else, I’ve got to save myself

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
Or drown it with a drink and out of date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me, they just left me on the shelf, no farewell
So before I save someone else, I’ve got to save myself
And before I blame someone else, I’ve got to save myself
And before I love someone else, I’ve got to love myself

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